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"The Prince Bride"Written By: ShenLong & DBZVelena Disclaimer: Neither DBZVelena or ShenLong own
in any way, shape, form or matter any rights to the Movie/Book "The
Princess Bride" All rights remain with Act III Communications
and William Goldman, the appropriate copyright owners. This story
is purely for entertainment purposes, no money is being made here.
This fic, "The Prince Bride" is based on this movie/book
but with several twists and Yaoi content. This fic also contains many
direct quotes and scenes from the movie/book. Rating: Since both stories are rated PG.-13 and this fic is based on them. Most of the fic will be PG.-13. However be careful to check individual chapters to be sure. (Shenny might add a lemon, you never know...) Warnings: Violence, romance, lime, fluff, cheesy-ness, AU, OOC, and lots more. Pairings: Lots! *snicker* Authors notes: DBZVelena: I'm the one that gotten
the idea to do this and I nagged Shen until she said, she'd help me.
And if you know me a lil bit, you knew there was no escape. So finally
after she too saw the movie and told me she'd help, I started work
on it right away. A Yaoi story based on the Movie/book The Princess Bride and Gundam Wing. This story is brought to you by the combined efforts of DBZVelena and ShenLong. Archive: www.gundam-wing-diaries.150m.com www.DBZVelena's Madhouse.com Anyone else please ask.
"The Prince Bride" Commenced. 2003 - 2009 ShenLong and DBZ Velena. Continued & finished by ShenLong 2010 - 2011 Chapter 27 – 'The Escape' As Duo rose from the bed and stood tall and confident before her, Relena felt the first stirrings of real fear. Her eyes watched as the sword was raised and pointed in her direction. She wasn't all that fond of sharp, pointy things, unless they were attached to her Heero or she was the one holding them, but we won't go there. A trickle of sweat ran down her back, along her backside and then trickled down her leg. At least she hoped it was sweat, right now she couldn't be all that sure. She swallowed and looked around. “Drop your Mascara!” Duo demanded again. Relena looked at the tube. It was her favorite mascara. “I will not drop it. Have you any idea how much this stuff costs?” she demanded. “I really don't give a shit,” Duo replied. “Drop it now or I'll chop it into itty bitty pieces.” “Can I put it back in my purse?” Duo sighed. “Okay.” “Thanks.” Relena grabbed her purse again and dropped the mascara into it. “Now what?” she asked, purse at the ready. “Take a seat.” Relena began to look around. “There isn't anywhere to sit,” she sneered. Heero appeared with a chair and put it down in front of the woman. “As I was saying, take a seat.” “Fine.” Relena huffed to herself and sat on the chair. “Shit this is hard,” she muttered. With the princess now sitting, Duo spoke to Heero, his eyes never leaving the woman, not because he didn't trust her to stay put; well, actually he didn't, but she was squirming around on the hard wood and the moves she was making were quite interesting to say the least. “Tie her up,” he told Heero. “I'm not your slave to be ordered about,” sniffed Heero. He was still quite pissed that Duo hadn't hugged him, kissed him senseless, groped... You get the idea. “You tie her up.” “I need to keep her covered so she doesn't make any sudden moves,” Duo replied. “Please, Heero, would you tie her up for me?” “That's better. It doesn't hurt to ask, not order me about like some common slave,” Heero muttered. “What shall I use?” “Try the cord on the curtains,” Duo offered. “Oh yeah, that should work.” Heero managed to get the cord free from the heavy drapes and moved back to the chair to tie Relena up. “Before I do, I just want to confirm you're not planning on a bondage session with her,” Heero stated. Duo rolled his eyes. “If I wanted a bondage session it most certainly wouldn't be with her, it would be with you, my love.” Heero's eyes glazed over, then they snapped clear. “How can I trust you?” he said. “You told me you would always come for me and yet when this pink peril had me at the altar I could distinctly hear you coming for someone else. This could all be another ploy.” “Heero, what you heard wasn't my coming for another, not that I didn't have many opportunities to, but I knocked them back. No that wasn't my voice, it must have been someone else.” Shit, I'd be lucky to get it up again after what this pink parsnip did to me, he thought to himself. Heero didn't look completely convinced, but he let it slide for now. Picking up the cord, he began to tie the princess to the chair. “You can make it as tight as you'd like,” Duo said with an evil grin. “Orders, orders,” Heero muttered to himself. “Just wait until I have you alone, my pirate, I'll show you orders.” Duo's sharp hearing picked up on the words and he shivered in anticipation of exactly what Heero would be ordering. Just as Heero finished securing the last of the knots, Wufei stepped into the room and looked around. “Where's Trowa?” he asked as he slung the bundle he had over his shoulder to the bed. A suspicious 'Ooof' came from the blanket encased item. Duo raised an eyebrow, Wufei raised one back. Duo raised the other eyebrow. Wufei shrugged. “Who or what have you got in there?” Heero asked seeing as how the other two were playing 'guess the emotion' game. “Just a little security,” Wufei replied mysteriously. “Now, where's Trowa?” “I thought he was with you, you did call for him to help you,” Duo replied. “I haven't seen him since he pushed the door open for me.” “Well, shit.” Duo began to sway on his feet. “Help him,” Wufei screeched to Heero. “What the fuck is this? Order Heero around day? I'm no slave or servant and I refuse to be treated like one.” Heero folded his arms across his chest in defiance. “Why does he need helping anyway, he seems to be doing just fine by himself.” “He has no strength,” Wufei growled. “That's not my fault,” Heero huffed. “Didn't anyone ever tell him he should eat his vegetables and red meat?” Duo finally swayed his last and went face first into the mat on the floor. “Fuck that's hard,” he groaned. “Shit! Duo,” Heero cried and sprinted across the room to where his love had face planted into the mat. He hauled him up and into his lap, stroking his fingers through Duo's bangs tenderly. “Oh, Duo, I'm sorry, I didn't realize.” “I did give you several clues,” Duo gritted out. His nose hurt like a bitch. “You know I'm no good at reading body language.” The sounds of a chair scraping against the stone floor interrupted the pair's impromptu argument and both heads swiveled around to see Relena struggling in her bonds. “I knew it! I knew he was bluffing. Damn pirate. I should have guessed, he couldn't hold a friggin' argument, let alone a sword.” Relena continued to struggle with her bonds, but Heero had done his job well. All those years of practice hog tying in the woods had finally paid off. Wufei rolled his eyes and covered his ears as the screeching continued. After thirty seconds of the noise, he couldn't stand it any longer. “Can I dispose of her for you? Start by cutting out the tongue and maybe removing the growth from her shoulders?” he asked Duo. “As tempting as the offer may be and regardless of what happens to us, I think we'd better let her live. Although I guess we could remove a few, non essential body parts,” Duo replied from his position reclining in Heero's lap. “What!? How dare you! I'll have your hide for this!” Relena started again, her voice building in pitch and volume as she continued to rant. Heero began to tug at Duo's boots, pulling one off and then the other. Duo gave his love a quizzical look. When Heero began to remove his socks, Duo couldn't contain his voice any longer. “Umm, Heero? I don't think I'm quite recovered enough yet to start anything,” he said. “Baka!” Heero let Duo's head drop to the floor with a thump as he shifted. “Ow!” “Only you, pirate boy would think of something like that at a time like this.” Heero removed Duo's socks and held them at arms length. “You might want to cover your nose,” Duo advised. “There's pitiful water to spare for washing when on a pirate ship.” “I gathered that,” Heero said as he caught a whiff of the socks. “When was the last time you washed them?” Wufei asked, turning a little green and doing his best to cover his mouth and nose. “I dunno. About three or four-” “Three or four days ago?! No wonder they stink,” Relena snarled, interrupting the pirate. “ -months ago,” Duo finished. “Perfect,” Heero said with an evil grin. Still gingerly holding the socks, he walked over to Relena whose eyes were widening rapidly. “Wha- What are you doing?” she asked. Before she could close her mouth, or say anything else, Heero pushed the socks into the orifice. “Maybe now I can have some peace and quiet,” he muttered and scooted across the room the the china bowl and water pitcher sitting on the side table. He scrubbed his hands vigorously. Meanwhile, the aroma, not to mention the taste, of the socks had completely permeated Relena's senses and the princess gave one last glare before her eyes rolled back in her head and she passed out. “Well, shit,” said Wufei and nodded his approval to Heero. “I always knew there was an evil, sadistic side to you, Heero,” Duo stated proudly. “Unless you want to discover exactly how evil and sadistic I can be, I'd suggest you put those boots back on, the smell of your feet is making me sick.” Heero grabbed a handkerchief and put it over his nose. “Ah, gotcha,” Duo replied and sheepishly pushed himself up to a sitting position and pulled his boots back on. Wufei was about to head for the window to open it when a voice came floating upwards. “Wufei? Wufei? CHANG! Where the fuck are you?!” All three people looked at each other. “Someone you know?” asked Duo. Wufei shrugged. “Could be anyone of many. I do have a rather large clientele base.” “Chang? Where the hell are you hiding?!” “Guess we should see who it is,” Wufei stated and with the other two following, he walked over to step out on the balcony. Once out onto the balcony, all three drew in great lungfuls of fresh air, keen to rid themselves of the smell of Duo's socks and feet. Down below in the cobbled street, Trowa looked up from where he was perched astride a Clydesdale cross horse and spotted the three. “Whoa,” he told the horse, which promptly kept walking. “Halt, stop, cease all forward movement.” The horse continued to amble. “Ever heard of the pet food company?” The horse stopped dead in its tracks. “Thank you.” Trowa turned his attention back to the balcony that was now several paces behind him. “Where the fuck is the reverse on this thing?” he muttered and leaned back looking for whatever it was that would make the horse back up. As his body moved, his hands tightened on the reins and consequently pulled on the bit in the horse's mouth. It began to back up. “Hey!” Trowa jerked forward, the horse stopped again. Trowa scratched his head and then put two and two together and came up with a pair of reins. “Hah! Thought you had me outfoxed, didn't you?” he told the animal. The horse simply snorted and stamped its huge hoof. Trowa pulled on the reins again, the horse moved backwards. “Who would have thought?” he mumbled, stopping when he was below the balcony. Realizing that Trowa was now beneath the balcony, Wufei sheathed his sword that he'd been sharpening whilst he waited and called for the other two to quit their snogging session and get back out onto the balcony. “Just when things were starting to get interesting we have to stop,” Heero muttered. He was really beginning to get pissed off with being interrupted when he was about to get into Duo's pants and discover the meaning of life, the universe and what other things he could do with that bulge. “Is that you, Trowa?” Wufei called down. “I think so. Hang on a second and I'll check.” Trowa pulled his wallet out from his pants and took a look at his driver's license. “Yes, it's me.” “Not quite the sharpest tool in the shed, is he?” Duo snickered. “That may well be, but he does have other advantages,” Wufei huffed. “And no, I'm not about to elaborate, or share,” he carried on quickly when he saw Duo's mouth about to open again. ”Hey, Wufei, after I opened that door I kinda got a little lost trying to find the pirate fellow again and I stumbled upon the Princess's stables. There was a shit load of horses in there, a couple of mules and two asses. I figured we'd need some sort of transport out of here and as there's four of us, that’s if you managed to find the pirate again cause I had no luck...” Duo waved down to Trowa. “Where the hell did you disappear to? I spent ages wandering around trying to find you and ended up in the stables,” Trowa growled. “I'll fill you in later,” Duo replied. “Oh, okay. Now, where was I?” “You were saying about transport out of here for us,” Wufei prompted and yawned. “Oh yeah, so I was. Just as well I picked out four horses and the two asses then. I thought I'd bring them along in case we ran into each other again and if we didn't then I'd just take them anyway and flog them off at a horse fair or something. I guess I can't do that now.” Trowa's face turned a little sad at the thought of the money he wouldn't be making now. All three on the balcony stared at the elf/man below and then to the other beasts he had tagging along. There were three horses and one donkey with a bundle tossed across its back. “I thought you said two asses?” Wufei shouted. “I did.” “There's only one ass down there.” “Nope, that's where you're wrong,” stated Trowa in a smug tone. He slipped from the back of the Clydesdale cross and sauntered over to the donkey. Grasping the bundle upon the beast's back, he pulled the blanket open to reveal a tied and gagged Quatre. “That's two asses by my reckoning,” he called back as he patted Quatre's rear and then covered him with the blanket again. “Well I'll be,” Wufei snickered. “Got to give him credit there,” Duo approved. “Can we get the fuck out of here?” asked Heero. “Trowa, you did something right,” Wufei called to his friend. Trowa snorted. “Of course I did, I always do the right thing, even if it might be the wrong thing.” He scratched his head. “I think I'll give up on the thinking.” Turning back to look at Wufei, he shouted, “Don’t worry, I'm not like blondie, I won't let it go to my head and make me think I'm so much better than everyone else, even if I am.” Wufei rolled his eyes. “Come on, let's get out of here,” Duo stated. “I seriously need a bath and some down time.” “The bath I agree with,” Heero said, “But the down time? I think you'd better start to think about some 'up' time.” 'Shit. I really hope I can get it up again,' Duo thought to himself. “Okay, elfie, here we come,” Duo called. Trowa opened his arms and held them out, waiting. Up on the balcony, the three had finished drawing straws and Heero had drawn the longest which meant he got to go first. “See you both at the bottom,” he said as he prepared to jump from the balcony. Duo ran a possessive hand over Heero's backside. “Oh yes, I will most definitely see you at the bottom.” Heero batted his hand away. “Duo! We have company,” he admonished. “Don't mind me,” Wufei said innocently. With a glare at the chinaman, Heero took a running jump and sailed out over the balustrade. For a moment there he appeared to be floating through the air, but then reality kicked in and he went plummeting like a stone towards the ground. “Use your parachute!” Duo yelled. Somehow the words permeated Heero's brain as he continued in his head first dive towards the cobbled street. 'Oh yeah,' he thought and pulled the cord at the last minute. 'This mission isn't complete just yet.' Trowa stood firm, arms outstretched as Heero rocketed towards him. “Ooof, ow, fuck!” Duo and Wufei watched, holding their breath as Heero was caught in Trowa's arms, the pair going down together in a tangle of limbs and curses. Scrambling off the elf/man, Heero checked himself over. “It's okay, I didn't break my leg,” he called to those above him. “You may not have but I think you broke mine,” Trowa muttered from his prone position on the cobble stones. “Oh, shit! Sorry. Here, I can fix it for you.” Heero jumped in and reached for Trowa's leg, intent on setting it back into place. “No way! Fuck off,” Trowa growled and pushing Heero away, he managed to get to his feet. Gingerly he tested the leg and found it held up okay. Heero looked a little disappointed he wasn't going to get to put his first aid skills to use. Looking up, Trowa spotted the other two still staring down at him. “Okay, who is next?” “Hang on a tick,” yelled Wufei and darted back into the room, emerging seconds later with the blanket wrapped bundle. “Here, catch.” Wufei tossed the bundle over the railing. Duo scratched his head as he watched. Once Trowa had caught the bundle and placed it to the side, Wufei stood next to Duo and placed an arm under Duo's shoulders to assist him in his jump. “Who or what is in the bundle?” Duo asked, still curious to know what Wufei's security was. “Oh, nothing much, just the man with the forked eyebrows.” Duo shook his head and snickered. With Wufei's assistance, he managed to climb over the balustrade. Just as Duo was ready to fall from grace, he turned to Wufei. “Thank you for your assistance.” “It has been my pleasure, in more ways than one,” Wufei replied. “You know something? It's strange, I've been in the escort business now for so long in an attempt to avenge my father by finding the man with the forked eyebrows that now that I have, I'm going to have to take a long look at my life and think about what to do with the rest of it. Make sense?” “Sort of.” Duo thought for a moment. “You ever thought about piracy? I think you'd make an excellent Dread Pirate Shinigami.” “Thanks, but no thanks. I think I'll most likely open up my own escort agency. Now I have the man with the forked eyebrows I can rent him out and take back some of the money he's cost me over the years. I'll talk to Trowa too seeing how he's got Quatre all tied up. I reckon we could soon have a thriving business going with those two in the stable.” “Then I wish you good luck. If I ever need anything along those lines, I'll look you up.” “You can look me up anytime,” Wufei replied with a leer. “You don't need an excuse.” As Duo began to fall forward he felt Wufei's hand grope him and couldn't help the soft moan that fell from his lips. Once Wufei had been caught, Trowa brought the horses forward, each person climbing aboard one and taking up their reins. Treize was tossed over the donkey's back to keep Quatre company and the four rode off into the night. ~ * ~ tbc... |
